Tuesday, February 24, 2009
"It's very easy to know a friend, even over a dinner. But friends aren't made over one month; one year. It takes five decades to form a true friendship." - My uncle.
This is what he said to the last patient who asked him why he wouldn't want to move overseas to live with his daughter and her family - that he wouldn't have any friends there, despite the supposedly large 'community'.
It got me thinking about friends. As in, I haven't lived 19 years yet to even talk about 2 decades, let alone 5, but I just started wondering about who might be considered to be friends, perhaps not just from my point of view, but for people in general.
And then I saw Jean Koh on the bus as I went home. She actually walked past me as I was boarding to presumably pay her fare by coins, but no hint of recognition on her face. She was my Sec 2 classmate in MGS, in the same CCA (GB) though not in the same squad, but she was in my contingent for the drill competition in 2004.
So as I sat down on the seat nearer the back, and she was standing up nearer the front, I was just wondering if she was my 'friend'. I mean, I haven't spoken to her in more than 4 years. Even if she was my classmate, it's not like we were close, or sat together, or did projects together.
Basically, was/is she my friend? Was/am I hers? Where do you draw the line between acquaintances and friends? Is it then true that even someone who was a very good friend, let's say for your two years in JC, might become quite a stranger if you don't see them again for the next 8 years or so, until one day you bump into them on the street?
Isn't that then quite sad? Considering all the good fun, camaraderie and bonding you experience when those people are quite central in your social circle. It's lost after years of no connection or communication, with perhaps the occasional "Happy Birthday" SMS you send because you get an email reminder of it.
I suppose it's also a bit sad if you would have considered the person your friend, at least remembering their name, face and how you knew them; while perhaps they've kind of forgotten who you are, until you need to remind them.
I was thinking of various degrees of friendship with people you happen to meet on the street.
- the kind you see, recognize, and then avoid their gaze because you don't really want to say hi
- the kind you see from afar and don't look at them directly until the last moment and then 'notice' them and say hi, before walking off
- the kind you see, and when you near them, say hi loudly enough, maybe ask them where they're going, before parting
- the kind you see, say hi and wave to, ask them a bit about their lives in general, wish them well and then part
- and the kind you see, hurry your steps to reach, wave and say hi with a smile, ask them what they're doing, how they are, share similar sentiments, and then ask if they want to go for lunch together if they're not busy.
Imagining scenarios is quite interesting, actually.
I also thought of something weird on the way. "Greater love has no one but this, that he lay down his life for his friends." - John 15:13
Would you be willing to die for your friends? And of course this is a hypothetical quiestion, but it refers to dying in a noble way, not a stupid way. I think we'd all like to say we're unselfish enough to be willing to die for our friends in one of those really terrible situations.
I think I might be able to; or at least I may say now that I could, though I wouldn't really know until confronted with such an option. But then I realised, I'd probably sacrifice my life for a friend because I know it's the right thing to do, rather than because I love my friend.
I know it sounds quite stupid and contradictory, but it's somehow true. On the other hand, I'd be willing to die for my mother or father or sister or brother because I love them, not because it's the right thing to do. And I'm quite sure of that.
Isn't it all kind of weird?
Sunday, February 22, 2009
I, Sarah, Xin Yuan and Elaine went to support Rayshio at this play he was acting in yesterday night. The bad thing was that it was at Republic Poly all the way in Woodlands! So far! Labels: friends
I actually reached Woodlands MRT early because my parents dropped me off at Yio Chu Kang to take a train at about 6, so I reached at 6.30, and ate dinner at Causeway Point. I got my favourite Mushroom Double Swiss at Burger King, then sat down at Macs (after buying a drink) because there was no other space.
I really wanted to buy these DVDs that were on sale, but I forgot to put more money in my wallet, and I resisted the temptation to use NETS. I realise now what it must be like to have a credit card and just use up money from the bank because you think it'll always have enough anyway.
I met Xin Yuan and Sarah at the control station, and we met Elaine at the bus interchange, only to learn that the 169 had just left! So we had to wait, and were very late for the play, only reaching at about just before 8pm.
The first play about 3 Fat Virgins was really funny. I laughed a lot at the part about the daughter who has to do the infamous growing-green-beans-in-cotton-wool experiment with varying amounts of water. The girl proceeded to try other liquids, including soya bean, 100 plus and saliva! And of course the mother tells her, "If it's not in the syllabus, you don't need to know!"
The next one was three mini stories about love, food and family, which is the one Rayshio was in. Pity I couldn't always hear what he was saying, because he was mostly on the other side of the stage.
After the intermission, when we went out and I saw Natalie Ng from primary school, and a lot of IP people: Gim Lim, Doris, Zhirong, Joel, Wei Liang, Joanna, Ying Ting, Louisa, Ben, Jiayi.
The last play was one about the daughter of a deceased brilliant but insane mathematician (hence my interest) who writes a ground-breaking proof involving Germain Primes, but is doubted by her sister and father's ex-student, thinking it to be her father's last piece of work. I sadly was unable to catch the math joke about imaginary numbers, because I think the actor talks too fast. But I found the story interesting!
The whole thing ended very late, at about 11, and we spent the longest time waiting outside for Rayshio to come out, only to find out that he was down at the first level! So we took a picture and tried to hurry home. I was intending to go with Sarah and Doris on 961 at the interchange, but as Elaine, Sarah and I crossed the bridge, Doris had disappeared!
I think she got lost, but managed to catch up to us on the bridge after calling her, and then Zhirong and Jiayi and then Ben followed. We JUST MISSED the 169 back, so we decided it was too late (11:20) and cabbed home, the three of us sharing with Zhirong. It was a nice ride back, talking about the play, about work, mahjong, results, school etc.
I miss school people!
Saturday, February 14, 2009
I'm too lazy to go into accounts, so I shall just jot down some stuff in bullet points. Labels: choir, dbsg, friends, MGS, suju
- On 11/2/2009 I think, on the 171 from Orchard road to home, I saw Melissa Tee with a friend on the bus, but she didn't see me until quite a bit later. Probably because it was terribly overcrowded.
- On that same bus, I could have sworn I saw this girl I remember now as my Pri 3 classmate, but I think she changed school to go GEP or something: Jacquelyn Tan. She still looked exactly the same - tall, fair, glasses, short wavy hair! - I passed my Final Theory Test on 12/2/2009, and I managed to get a practical test date at the end of April, so I really hope I can pass in one shot! Thank God!
- I just came home from watching Talentime 2009 in NJC. This may sound utterly mean and superior, but I feel that the standard may have dropped, based on the performances. Of course, I think the OST one with Xuemin, Sheena and Trudy was good, save the terrible microphone balance.
- It's as if people don't really see winning Talentime as such a big thing anymore, or really like music, but just take part for fun. I don't know which position is better, though.
- I recently saw Wen Song and this new bass called Paul on television at this performing event, where I think they represented our school. Well done!
- I kind of wish I'd signed up for relief teaching, but then I'm reminded of how great a responsibility teaching actually is. Those poor kids would probably suffer from my inadequate skills.
- Today on the bus I thought I heard some girls mention 'Tohoshinki'. Dismissing it as my imagination, I then definitely heard 'Super Junior M'. LOL!
Friday, February 6, 2009
Well, today's my sister's birthday! She's turning 15, which is the age when Singaporean citizens get their pink IC! I don't really feel that she's so old, but then, we all get older unwittingly. Labels: family
We didn't even celebrate today, but yesterday, and tonight she went to eat pizza with her friends. And I wasn't feeling particularly hungry tonight, and I forgot about the cake, so I didn't eat it either. Aww.
Thursday, February 5, 2009
Yeah, I'm kind of sick today. Last night I had that terrible experience when I'm sort of dreaming and sort of not, like my dream involves what my body is moving in the night, but twists it into something strange. It sucks because it's not really sleeping, and it's uncomfortable. Labels: family
So I didn't go to the clinic today. I think I have a mild fever, along the lines of 38 deg Celsius. Which really isn't anything to whine about, but because I've been feeling crummy, so I've been complaning. Feeling hot, sweating, unable to sleep well, muscle aches, possible heartburn (or at least discomfort between the oesophagus and stomach), etc.
I want to apologize to my family for being so grouchy today. Seriously, I should be avoided when I'm sick, because I'm terrible. I was unfriendly during dinner, when we were supposed to be celebrating my sister's birthday (which is tomorrow). I made them eat my leftover dinner!
Anyway, there's an apt verse for this. Proverbs 17:22 "A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones."
Thanks to all the blogs i referred to (countless) for html code help :) (esp. cyn' and sixseven)
Adobe Photoshop Elements for supernatural abilities
